At 4:13 this morning, someone knocked on my door.
At 4:16 this morning, someone started pounding on my door.
At 4:17 this morning, someone started pounding on my door so loudly that waking up started to seem like a good idea.
The last time this happened, there was a big honkin’ fire in my apartment complex that almost […]

Pay very close attention, folks.
The picture below is why we’re going to lose the war.
It’s why, within the next 30 years, we’ll no longer be considered among the most powerful nations in the world.
This is the reason we are absolutely doomed.

This, my friends, is Fried Coca-Cola.
That’s right. This country is headed to Hell in […]

What do you do when your significant other starts snoring pretty regularly? This has recently become a problem for me, which is tricky because, while it’s incredibly disturbing to a guy who gets next to no sleep to begin with, it’s also a little humiliating for this person you care about who now routinely […]