Why does the State of Maryland give a shit if I wear my seatbelt?
I hate my seatbelt. It’s uncomfortable and it wrinkles my shirt and I don’t like it and I don’t care what you think. My safety is none of your business, and I really don’t understand where the State […]

Why does the driver’s side windshield wiper always go bad first? I’ve been driving a long time and the passenger-side wiper has never gone wonky first. I can’t see shit, but the pinhead I carpool with has a clear view of everything, even though she’s sleeping so soundly that her shirt’s covered in […]

Continuing the Why Saga…
Why can’t Courtney Love get her shit together? Let’s say for a second that you’re kinda talented when it comes to music. You’re in a respected, successful band, you’ve got shitloads of money, a beautiful kid, glamorous friends, and everything else your heart desires.
How could you possibly manage […]